To the people I hate the most,

This post has been written for Day 12 of the 30 Days 30 letters challenge. Topic for today: A Letter to the person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain.

 


To the people I hate the most,

No you are not at all dear, so you won’t even be addressed that way. Get it clear right away, I hate you. And I have no intentions whatsoever to tell you anything! But given a chance to write this letter, there’s probably no harm in communicating certain things.

What you do in your life, and the way you choose to live is utterly your choice. I am indeed nobody to interfere. But then, the way you are or have been, most often, I am glad I have distanced myself from you. I’ve always grown up learning and absorbing one thing: always be truthful and honest to your deeds and morals.

That is what I guess I mistook from your painted face, failing to see the real, dishonest, unprofessional, vindictive face of a liar, a cheat!

You were dishonest and absolutely uncommitted to your work and how conveniently you thought you were fooling me and others. Well, you just proved yourself to be a bigger fool. And yes, let me tell you, you have no standards whatsoever for you’re dishonest to every piece of bread you earn!

You think you could use me, take advantage of my feelings, willingness to help, my open-minded attitude and get yourself a “Heroic” image telling others you conveniently played around and then dumped an emotional fool? Being in the most respected professions, belonging to that (professional) section of the society whose ethics and morals are the most respected ~ you just proved to the world how dishonest and “Moral-less” people of your breed can get so they better beware of you!

You think you could talk nonsense about me behind my back and I would never know of it. Well, good confidence. It would have been better if you had that confidence to look at your reflection in the mirror, eye to eye; or the confidence for your own principles and credibility. Silly me! I just forgot you never had any.

In whatever form you’ve met me till date, well, you exist no more, for even if you appear before me, I can see through you! 🙂

 

~ Someone who has just bettered the art of knowing people after meeting bastards like you!

No One Killed Jessica – Still a Soul Stirrer!

Released in January 2011, No One Killed Jessica, is a political crime thriller by director Rajkumar Gupta takes you through the struggle of Sabrina Lal and her family, seeking justice for her sister’s killer, a politician’s son. The film is based on a real life incident: the much known Jessica Lal murder case.

Jessica Lal, a celebrity barmaid and model, had been shot dead at a crowded socialite party around 2am in April 1999.  The five-year long trial finally ended up acquitting Manu Sharma and a number of others on 21 February 2006. However, after Tehelka’s sting operation and breakthrough journalism, intense media and public pressure followed on the politicians, judiciary and police. All this, finally that led the prosecution to appeal in the Delhi High Court, wherein the proceedings were conducted on a fast track basis with daily hearings conducted over 25 days. The trial court judgment was overturned, and Manu Sharma was found guilty of having murdered Jessica. He was sentenced to life imprisonment on 20 December 2006.

After paroles that had been extended multiple times, during which Manu Sharma had been spotted partying in a night-club; finally in November 2009, Sharma was forced to submit himself back to the Tihar Jail.

Ten long years to justice. Patience, grit, determination, humiliation – what all the family faced. It shook me!

Each time I watch the movie, its dialogues and story stir me. It makes me think of the miserable condition of the judiciary and laws in my country. It does make me feel helpless. I make it a point to sign almost every online petition I find relevant wherein a voice needs to be strengthened to let it be heard, in a hope of doing my bit. And today I am writing, venting out my concerns. Somehow, it has not sufficed. I still feel helpless.

Of late when I watched No One Killed Jessica, the Delhi gang-rape case came to my mind: one and a half years to the brutal, inhuman rape and her eventual unfortunate death with multiple organ failure, the braveheart’s parents still see the Supreme Court of India staying the death sentence of her rapists.

And then I go on to think of the n number of acid attack, molestation, eve teasing, sexual assault, domestic violence and rape cases that have been pending in courts, those thousand women waiting for justice and those rapists roaming free, unleashed, without control over their bottoms and with that arrogance of masculine-superiority over female minds and bodies. It has been a decade for the laws to have been bent in the Jessica Lal murder case trial. It happened again. It has been happening time and again.

If the highest court of my country gives regressive judgements one after another, who do I turn to for justice? They’ll rightfully call me a criminal if I murder the guilty myself!

This clearly means I must be a self-protective woman, knowing basic self-defence, because there are vultures roaming around in every nook and corner of the society who are hungry of my sexual and moral submissiveness.

Often when I’ve travelled by public transport, I’ve been stared at grossly, scanned from head to toe, cunningly smiled at, followed, indirectly been asked for my cell phone number just because I was alone or I had the guts to decently ask a “male” passenger of the bus’ departure time. I’ve been seen as a spoilt modern woman because I stay alone and my fiance and/ or other male friends keep visiting me home. I and my friend sitting in a car outside a garden, having chai on a late evening had been masturbated at. Why?

So what do I tell our political leaders who claim safety of women or media-sensationalised rape cases in my country? Is this the society that has been made for me? Is this the country I am expected to bring my daughter into and sing to her, what a wonderful world?

I am a so-called responsible citizen who has casted a vote, every single election since she was 18 because they told me even a single vote matters. Does it really matter? I just can quote a few lines, again from the movie, No One Killed Jessica (in hindi).

Song Credits:

Song: Dua | Singer: Meenal Jain, Joi Barua, Raman Mahadevan & Amitabh Bhattacharya,

Music: Amit Trivedi | Lyrics: Amitabh Bhattacharya

Andhere tarse, khuda ke ghar se
Ujaale na kyun barse
Guzaare kaise, saza ke jaise
Din namo ke lagey arse
Sab sajde de, sajde de
Dua karo

The Scare called “Relatives”

Many of us have experienced the set of annoying relatives and family friends! Love them or Hate them, you simply can’t ignore them; for they cease to be normal most often! The other day I wrote about Atithi Tum Kab Jaoge on somewhat similar lines. Discussions with friends and colleagues over certain typical relatives or family friends/ acquaintances in general, brings me to this post.

Let me enumerate a few types!

The Advisor!

These uncles and aunts, and grand-uncles and -aunts are way too much concerned about you and think they can be the best agony aunts! At the same time, they think they’ve lived  a balanced life learning good and bad from their experiences. Fair enough! And then they will shower all their experience on you as and when they get a chance! When we speak of a generation gap or some forward thinking we got  or simply tell them (upon their asking) that we were at a friend’s place having a vodka party, “Beta, We’ve seen an era! We know how it is! You don’t understand how horrible the consequences can be! You’re still a kid! You’ve not seen this world at all!” The problem is: it doesn’t end there! I could probably take that if I were a 10 year-old but being 25: an adult and an employed/ earning citizen, won’t that be a bit too much?

The Ascetics and Believers!

Uncle has given up alcohol, smoking and has turned a vegetarian after enjoying the golden moments, even those wild pubs of Delhi, till 40 and has turned to Yoga, Meditation, Pooja-paath, being vegetarian and the rest. For them, not going to a temple or not performing pooja everyday makes us atheists, despite us having our faith in place! Moreover, uncle will spend the one get together your family has in a year’s time, convincing you of the error of your ways. Dude, they’re holier and purer than you! After meeting them, I feel that imposing religious, traditional and spiritual beliefs and practices in anyone should be made a legal offence!

The Success Stories-Uncle-and-Aunty!

Uncle’s tales of his accomplishments and his son’s school grades, sports medals, Engineering/ Medicine-Degrees from International Universities and MNC Jobs – they all seem never ending! In the end, even if you hardly care, you’re made to feel you and your kids are a miserable failure in life. Anything less than a Doctor or Engineer is a shame! So what if you’re a self-employed photographer and travel the world and do the most interesting things those engineers might hardly get to do even on holidays, you just press buttons, there’s no skill! So what if you’re a writer for a leading magazine or an English Daily or a War Correspondent, even a class 10th kid can write English – what new did you do! Basically you cease to exist!

Gossip!

You are their relative: this fact entitles them to know every detail about your life, the salon you go to; the restaurant you date your boyfriend with; your why-the-hell-you-are-25-and-single status; why-the-hell-don’t-you-get-this-beauty-treatment-done; even the brand and type of inner wear you put on; your married life and so on! Curious no; inquisitive inherently! “What? You’re married for 2 years and have no kids!” |Cut|”Beta, I tell you, this pammi aunty’s son fell for a Marwari girl and what all he faced in life, baba! You better take care and don’t fall prey to such girls haan!” | Cut | “Don’t even think of sending your son to that college; else get prepared he’ll come out alcoholic, with long hair, nerdy beard and a girl from some other state!” and so on! What follows? Rumour Mongering!

The Narad Munis!

They think everybody in your family, from your spouse, to your children to your parents cease to understand you and do you deliberate and intentional injustice! “You have never been understood in your family! Poor Dear! I feel so sorry for you! I exactly know what you’re going through! But I don’t understand why do you take it from them and not fight instead” The agony aunt feels she did some great job by consoling you and the next day you end up in an argument with your family members! According to her, everything you think is ruining your world is right and will strongly supports the one you feel like strangling to death!

“I am the Best”-Syndrome-affected Brats

Such cousins, aunts, uncles make you feel miserable than ever before! You go to shop with them and they’re like, “I buy stuff from this place! They have this specific brand I like! Very classy stuff you know!” Even if you find that place horrible, they’ll take you there for shopping and buy something of their choice for you! “Oh you didn’t watch those X-men Cartoons or play those action-packed video games? Dude, you’ve been clearly deprived in your childhood!” Even if you found watching travel shows and reading books more interesting than the stuff the moron did, you’re a loser! “Oh man! you’re 13 and you don’t get yourself waxed or upper lips and eyebrows threaded! In my school, people will laugh at me for this!” I’ll take that pain when I think I can handle it!

 

When Someone Drives Anger & Arrogance: Confessions and More!

Somewhere during February 2013: Angry and Frustrated, I was rashly driving the car home. Perhaps I was just driving my temper and not the car. I reached my destination shortly and Shantanu tells me, “Your car doesn’t deserve your anger. It’s dangerous.” We had an argument earlier and I didn’t pay heed! Perhaps I could have rammed into someone and regretted it for the rest of my life. Thankfully, I didn’t! It’s thanks to my fortune and not my driving skills. The anger that preoccupied my mind did not make me realize this.

Once or twice such a thing repeated. But of late, never. I don’t remember the day realization struck me but it struck me for the good and I am happy about it. No excuses or explanations for the previous act, it was wrong.

Speaking of that, I am sharing some pathetic encounters:

February 24, 2013: On February 24, a youngster Vismay Shah rammed a motorcycle near Lad Society, in the Vastrapur area of Ahmedabad. The two bike-borne youths – Shivam Dave, 25, and Rahul Patel, 21 – died. Shah escaped from the spot but later surrendered before the police following pressure from all sides. News reports suggest he was drunk when he was driving. Here’s a video that got captured on the CCTV and has been reported by a local news channel:

The bike-borne youth’s kin are still struggling in court.

x-x-x-x-x

As I was walking towards the parking space, just off the main road in the main market in Vidhyanagar, a car driver intending to turn his car right and park, almost rammed into me from behind. The car hit me with some force and braked. I balanced, trying not to fall and had a muscle pull. When I turned, the driver, without getting off his car, rolled down the window glass and told me, “Can’t you see! Are you blind or what to not notice a car coming?”

Despite me feeling like slapping my sandals on his face, I just reminded him of basics of driving called horn and brakes and left.

x-x-x-x-x

Sristi (name changed) and her father were driving back home in their car. There was a bike with two youngsters ahead of them and a car ahead of the bike, driven by a lady who was talking over the phone. The road was a slope. Suddenly, the lady lost control owing to lack of attention and her car rolled back, hitting the bike. The youngsters fell but were thankfully safe and not injured. Sristi and her father stopped the car and got off to ensure things were fine. Then they slammed the lady driver. The lady replies, “Do u know who I am?”

The youngsters thanked Sristi and her father and decided not to complaint to the police. The lady drove ahead.

x-x-x-x-x

The conclusions are obvious: Anger Frustration and Distractions are dangerous to driving, apart from Alcohol. I mustn’t have driven rash no matter how angry I was. The lady should at least have the courtesy to go to the men who fall, apologize (even if it wasn’t her fault) and make sure they’re okay. The man who rammed his car into me should have had the courtesy to apologize and ask if I was fine.

Two, there’s more of arrogance than acceptance towards a mistake that makes a whole lot of people insane. On what basis does the woman ask Sristi, “Do you know Who am I!” or does the man ask me, “Can’t you see? Can’t notice a car coming!”

Three, there’s humanity left in the world yet justice takes a lot of time. Passers-by came to the bike-borne youth’s rescue (as seen in the video) but their kin still await justice in court.

Angry Rash driving is something many of us might have done. No advice to anyone here. Just some confessions and food for thought!

The XX in 2020

The XX/XY sex-determination system is the most familiar, as it is found in humans. In the system, females have two of the same kind of sex chromosome (XX), while males have two distinct sex chromosomes (XY). In the proud and patriarchal Indian society, the preference has always been the Xy! Well, what about the other one then?

While thinking of XX, I also thought of the roman number 20 and that reminded me of the overrated year 2020 – seen as the year when India will change, get developed and will have a new horizon of opportunities.

2020 isn’t all that far fetched; thus my hopes of any drastic advancement are beginning to die out. Nevertheless, let us assume we are already in 2020! So how will the XX emerge as a gender in the modern age? The XX in 2020?

A thousand random thoughts crossed my head and I remembered some strong portrayals of the XX the form of characters in films of comics, goddesses, et al.  A great deal of wickedness is here somehow!

XenaXena the Warrior princess! While Xena was an infamous warrior on a quest to seek redemption for her past sins, how about technology or genetic engineering helps women cultivate such special powers for their own safety!

 

 

 

Helen of Troy – Well women in India have always been beautiful. How about a mystic beauty that possesses a special power to destroy mankind at the woman’s discretion.

Ma Kali – the Indian goddess of destruction. In today’s age she would perhaps would wipe out certain communities altogether.

Vampire

 

Vampires – How about, with s little of prejudice happening the other way round, women be born with vampirical powers that can be used on men!

Buttercup of the Powerpuff Girls – Now how many times have you fantasize being Buttercup and keep hitting everyone who messes with you?

 

Lisa-Simpson

 

Lisa Simpson – Perhaps the most practical one that would make a perfect XX woman in 2020. Lisa Simpson is a smart, witty, independent girl who focuses on her goals

 

 

That Suppressed Gender – Reality Check

While thinking about issues of the suppressed gender of the Indian society, I remembered an NGO called Safar, based in Ahmedabad. It deals with a number of issues with regards to pluralism. What does it mean?

Pluralism:

(noun) A condition or system in which two or more states, groups, principles, sources of authority, etc., coexist.

So in this co-existence, there is no discrimination amongst individuals be it economic, social, caste based, sect based, born out of religion, born out of gender or sexual orientation, nationality, statehood or others. In such a co-existence, all individuals are practically equal.

I’ll be keeping Gender as the focal point of this post. It is shocking to know that even in the so-called modern Indian society, there are n number of gender issues. The law books and the constitution of India state are modern to the extent of legally recognizing the third gender or the LGBT (Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender) community. But the society has gone the other way round.

If you do some reality check, you’ll probably know that the social progression has not occurred at all. Rather, the so-called modern society has turned towards regression such that even “women” or “females” are perhaps not considered an equal gender. I won’t be wrong if I call most women in Indian society as a suppressed gender. It is their unfortunate plight about which perhaps nobody has been doing anything! If I begin to list out issues, an endless list goes. Illustrative but not exhaustive, here are some highlighted issues women in India face very often.

  • Foeticide
  • Infanticide
  • Child Sexual Abuse
  • Child Marriage (at times to elderly men)
  • Lack of Right to Education
  • Human Trafficking
  • Domestic violence
  • Dowry
  • Acid Attack
  • Sexual Harassment
  • Rape
  • Lack of Autonomy and Authority

Above is simply a glimpse of the extent to which the women laws are being breached in our country a glimpse of crime against women.

But then, there are things that girls or women face every day, in their routine life and unfortunately they are made to abide by ridiculous rules! Let me list down some events and practices:

  • The infamous menstrual taboo
  • Someone whistling, teasing, jerking off while staring at a woman in a public place
  • Taking a woman to be a slut if she’s hanging out late at night with a group of men
  • Judging a woman by her size
  • 26 and Single?
  • Calling her indecent and uncultured if she puts on shorts or sleeveless & low-neck tops after a certain age
  • “Single Woman? Journalist? Work till late? Looking for an apartment? Going to live alone? Male friends will be visiting?” – Ummm…. We don’t accept such a (an awful) culture! Sorry! No Apartment for you!
  • Women must cover their faces with a burqa or ghoonghat (long scarves/ sarees draped over head) while in public
  • Disallowing a woman to pursue her career or take up a job of her choice
  • Thinking that women mustn’t work if husbands earn well
  • Robbing unmarried women and widows of their independence and freedom of choice
  • Stigma against divorcees and widows
  • Looking upon divorcee women as uncultured whores considering that the fault for the broken marriage is always theirs
  • Married women forced into an intercourse
  • The mindset that daily jobs like opening the door when the bell rings, getting milk, preparing tea,  serving water to husbands and guests is that of a woman

The list will endlessly continue. You might have examples from your own family and circle of friends and colleagues. Crime against women is a far-fetched issue if I simply go on quoting issues alike the above!

This is how the so-called equal gender in the modern Indian society turns into that suppressed Gender!

“P” for Politicians? Oh please!

I’ve often met a number of people who say that my job (in the news industry) is challenging. Such people often call my job so interesting, that I am aware of the political scenario inside out and I am so updated with a hundred odd things that happen around. Well yes, I am updated with a hundred “really” odd things, or rather I have to be. Fortunately or unfortunately, it is my job! But too much of anything is just too nauseating!

I miss those days of selectively reading newspapers, magazines and other random stuff! Nowadays, all that or even reading a book or blog of my choice has unfortunately and circumstantially taken a backseat. Taking in and absorbing everything often gets you feel nauseated and that is exactly what has been happening to me since the past many days!

Come elections in India and a reporter/ journalist/ news writer’s “Being doomed” days just begin! Your days of selective reading turn into selective coverage and the selection is politics! To add fuel to fire, wherever you go, people discuss the same thing – Elections, Politicians! The social media too is flooded with it!

To try and get out of it, you try to look at the little social life you’re left with: the people with whom you didn’t catch up because you’ve been working your ass off ! You go out and meet your relatives/ friends just to forget that political shit you’ve been dealing with day in and day out. But is it any better a choice? I doubt!

Oh! So, you’re a journalist? What do you think? Who according to you is going to form the government? Mr. A is on the high this time. But you know what! Whoever comes, nothing can ever change in India!”

“Grrrr….” (I grumble in my mind)

“Well yes uncle! Mr. Z is going to form the government this time! I’ve managed to get all the voting machines rigged so that all the votes go to Mr. Z! You know why I did so? Coz he’s paid me huge sums of money!” (I would love to tell them this!)

Still not done? Ah! The million dollar question is yet to come

So who do you support? You know, the younger generation nowadays is too vulnerable! And so is the media! They just don’t know the harsh reality and get carried away by the publicity of various politicians!” 

(As if I don’t know! )

Well yes I am opinionated, I am a dedicated voter, I have a bit of political leaning and I have done the reality check as well! I am good at my work and I do that day in and day out, but that doesn’t mean it is something I would like to talk about even after work!

“So could you please give me a break from it? Why? Because I have a life outside work and I may not simply want to discuss about it.” 

 

While thinking of a post-idea for “P” for the A to Z Challenge 2014, work had pre-occupied my mind so much that inspiration had gone for a toss! “Politicians” is all I could think of but never wanted to write about them for the very thought was nauseating! So “P” for Politicians? Naah! Give me a break!